motorcycle trip. More specifically I'm finishing up the first day of
said trip waiting for my dinner and finding a campsite courtesy of the
magic that is the iPhone.
Ostensibly the reason for my trip is that I want to spend four days
riding my motorcycle through the mountains, and I do. However I've
learned over the years that I do some of my best thinking while
touring on a motorcycle and after the last year and a half of my life
I need to do some serious thinking.
Over my life I've played many roles, some good and some not so much
and over the last year it's been more in the "not so much" end of the
spectrum. Over the last year I've been battling depression off and on,
and I've done a number of things, and acted in a number of ways, I
wish I hadn't. Now the easy way out would be to blame the depression
but to be honest I'm not sure that puts the cause and effect in the
right order. In part I think the depression might actually be due to
my awareness of the gap between the person I want to be and the person
I've become.
So no more!
There are a number of specific steps I need to take and I have some of
them outlined in my head. Hopefully when I post tomorrow I'll have
more of them in place and I'll be able to present something that looks
kind of like an action plan.
The one thing I will do now however is apologise. There are a number
of people my actions have hurt and you know who you are. You're people
I took for granted or treated as a convenience or simply ignored you
when it was inconvenient to do anything else and I'm very sorry for
that. You deserve to be treated better and I didn't, this isn't me
asking forgiveness it's simply me saying I'm sorry.
Till next we meet....
